Our Story!

As many of you know, Jacob and I are going to be sealed for time and all eternity on Friday, December 30, 2016! From what I've gathered, people really want to hear the story of Jacob (Stucki) and I, and how this all happened--especially the proposal part. So, seeing as I have a little bit of spare time on my hands, I thought I would write down our story. The story of Brittany and Jacob (my very favorite story!).

BEFORE WE MET

A long time ago (2 years ago, to be exact), in a galaxy far, far away (Rexburg, Idaho), I was studying Elementary Education, but felt like I needed to switch my major to Communication Disorders. That was a little problematic, seeing as how BYU-Idaho didn't have that major. Within a matter of weeks, and after a lot of praying, I had successfully applied and been accepted to Utah State University in May of 2014. 

Flash forward to that fall, where I moved to Logan, Utah, and moved into an apartment I had never seen, with 5 other girls I didn't know at all. I was SO lucky with the girls I got that year, and I was especially blessed with an incredible room roommate, Stephanie Baker, who became one of my greatest friends I still have today. 

After that school year of sharing a room with Stephanie, we both went back to work at our previous summer jobs as cooks in more of a camp setting. We both felt that that was the right move for us, and we stayed in contact through those months. 

About halfway through the summer of 2015, as we were both working, Stephanie called me up one day and told me there were two guys she wanted to set me up with from where she was working, but particularly one, whose name was Jacob Stucki, but everybody referred to him as Stucki. Repeatedly, she kept telling me that I needed to at least meet him, since he would be attending Utah State that coming school year, but really wanted to set me up on a date with him. I told her I was interested in maybe (maybe) meeting him, but that I really didn't like blind/set-up dates. They just hadn't ever worked well for me. 

At the beginning of the school year, Stephanie and I weren't roommates (unfortunately), but we still did a lot together every week. We would attend the weekly Institute Devotional, Religion in Life, every Friday, and then go do baptisms at the Logan temple right after. It was so great, and I loved spending that time with her. She then started inviting Stucki to come sit with us, and he always would sit by Stephanie, but not by me. They would talk for forever, and I never really talked with either of them, so initially, I wasn't really into him, just because they would always talk and I never really got the chance to talk to him. 

Anyways, after a few times of meeting him at Religion in Life, we still hadn't really talked, so I just kind of told Stephanie I had given up on any hope for that blind date. **Side note: Stephanie hadn't ever told him about me, so he had no idea she was wanting us to go out at all. He just was comfortable talking with a familiar face from work.** She told me she understood, and we kind of left it at that. 

AFTER WE MET

After we met, we never did anything together. I don't really remember sitting by him anymore at Religion in Life, and I also started dating another boy, which lasted until mid-January. After that break up, I was pretty anti-guy, anti-dating, I'm-my-own-person, I'm-living-my-own-life type of mentality. It was really good for me actually. I feel like I grew in the ways I needed to, especially spiritually and mentally, I could focus on school and what I really wanted to do, I got my first real job, and I just felt like I had become the person I was really needing to be. It was a great time for me, and I needed that low point in my life to see where I needed to grow and stretch to be. 

BEFORE WE REALLY MET

In April, my roommates from the first year at USU and I have a tradition that every conference we have a sleepover on Saturday night and then spend Sunday together and watch conference together, while we have food we've made, and just enjoy that time together that we used to have so often as roommates. That Saturday night though, Kenzi and Kara told us that we could invite guys over for ice cream after the Priesthood session that night. Initially, I didn't think I knew any guys I wanted to invite. After about a minute, this nagging voice in my head kept saying, "STUCKI. STUCKI. STUCKI. STUCKI." I kind of pushed it away, thinking that was a crazy idea. I had met him before, but nothing ever happened--I hadn't ever even really talked to this guy before, and now I was feeling like he really needed to come over and I needed to meet him. 

I pushed that prompting away for about 30-45 minutes, but it kept getting stronger, and finally I went to Stephanie and told her she could invite Stucki if she wanted to. Stephanie's face LIT up, and she immediately texted him. I felt much better about asking her, but still felt really confused as to why I felt so prompted to ask him to come over. 

WHEN WE MET...AGAIN

When Jacob knocked on the door, and Stephanie let him in, I knew something was different from when I had met him before. I was really attracted to him, and I felt like I needed to really get to know him that night. I don't really know how to explain it, but it felt like all of a sudden I had known him before, and that he was someone really familiar--but not just a "hey, I think I've seen you before" type of way. 

We didn't really talk for about the first 5 minutes, as we were still setting up ice cream and toppings for the guys, but as he was getting ice cream, I came up behind him in line, and we talked briefly. We exchanged names, and that we recognized each other from the fall. I had so many butterflies in my stomach, and I was head over heels for him from that moment on. 

Throughout that night, we played lots of games with everyone--board games, card games, dice games, and even had a mini-foosball table tournament with everyone there. My favorite game was definitely when I played Jacob. I don't think my eyes were open for any of the game, because I was laughing so hard and enjoying his company and sense of humor so much. 

After all the games, we kind of broke into little groups and had our own conversations as it got later and later at night. Jacob and Stephanie and I talked until 3:30 in the morning, when he then realized that we weren't leaving, but were having a sleepover. As I have talked to him since, he was planning on asking for my number that night as Stephanie and I would leave to go out to our cars, but seeing as how we never left, he didn't ask for my number. :) What did happen though was even better, at least in my book. Stephanie thanked him for coming over, and he thanked her for inviting him. But then he looked over at me, pointed at me and said, "Hey, it was really nice meeting you." He smiled really big, and then closed the door. 

Fast forward through the happy screaming, giggling, and daydreaming, but Jacob invited me over for Indian food with his roommates and another apartment of girls they were friends with, and Jacob and I talked all night long. He took me back to my apartment that night, and asked me on our first date, which I spazzily agreed to with a, "Yes. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!" I was SO extremely happy, and I was thrilled that he liked me enough to at least go on a date with me. 

We went to Olive Garden and to go see Zootopia that weekend, and when he dropped me off after that date, he asked me on another date as well. Our coming dates were a lot of fun--making pizzas, him surprising me with rented puppies, watching movies, deciding we liked each other enough to become official, going to bonfires with friends, having our first kiss at a campfire, going to music concerts, him bringing me flowers, symphony concerts, car bootings, graduations, and just falling in love with someone who was made so perfectly for me. 

My entire life, I have wanted and imagined what Jacob is, and he is even more than I ever wanted, but never knew I needed. He is incredible, and I am so lucky that he is mine! 

It was kind of crazy for me, because mentally, I've told myself I need a while to get to trust someone enough, as well as time to really fall in love with someone, before I would know I needed to marry them. However, that theory was totally thrown out the window with Jacob. On our second date, I knew he was different from every other guy I had dated, and I absolutely loved being with him and learning more about him. At the end of our second date, my heart knew he was the one I needed to marry, but my mind took a little while longer to easily convince. 

By the end of May, after we had been dating for about a month and a half, we had both gotten our answers that we should start talking about getting engaged. It was such an exciting moment, but a very overwhelming moment as well. I knew my answer was to proceed with this, but in all honesty, it scared me a little, just because I hadn't been dating him for very long. As we kept going in our discussing the possibility of being engaged and what would have to have happen (work, where we'd live, him in school, etc), I kept being reassured over and over by the Spirit that this was the right man I needed to marry, and that everything would fall into place as it should. 

His mom had a diamond fall out from her original engagement ring, which she now has a different ring on her finger, but had given Jacob the diamond to use when he met the right girl. We talked about the different settings, and ultimately went to one of my dad's friends at Wilson Diamonds in Orem to have a custom solitaire ring made to highlight his mom's beautiful, super sparkly, diamond. :) It's not a big diamond, but boy, does it sure know how to sparkle. I'm also glad it's not a big, bulky ring, or has a setting lifted really high off the band that snags on everything. It's perfect, and I keep catching myself staring at it throughout the day. 

THE PROPOSAL

Long story short, I knew Jacob was going to be proposing around the end of July/beginning of August. We had gone ring shopping, and we even had a date and time reserved at the Salt Lake Temple for our sealing. I just didn't know exactly when the proposal would be, or how he would do it, which made me really nervous. :)

At the ring store, they told me that my engagement ring would be ready as early as July 30, and the wedding band would be coming later. 

On July 18 (Monday), Jacob called me, asking if I had any plans for Friday night. I told him I might, seeing as how we might be preparing for my Grandma's 80th birthday party, which was that coming Saturday. He left it at that, and we didn't really say much more about that Friday, but we knew he was coming to the party that Saturday.

Wednesday, July 20, Jacob calls and asks if he could take me out on either Friday night or Sunday night, but preferably Friday. I told him Friday would work better, to which he agreed that that was his preference.

Thursday, July 21, Jacob calls and asks if he can take me on a "surprise" date the next night. He told me to wear something a little dressy, but not with heels, and to not eat anything for dinner before he picked me up. 

At this point, I was starting to really think he was going to propose. He was calling more than usual, sounding a little more nervous, and was taking me on a "surprise" date, which wasn't like him. He's usually so detail oriented, that I always know exactly what we're doing throughout the entire date. However, I was a little confused, because the ring wasn't going to be ready yet...or was it? 

Friday, July 22, I was out painting furniture for our bedroom, which was so kindly given to us by a family that's renovating their house, and so I didn't have my phone with me. Jacob had called 3 times by the time I checked my phone at about 10 that morning, and had left several text and voice messages, asking if we were still on for that night, and if I was okay. In his defense, I had gone to a movie late the night before, and I guess he didn't know if I had made it back okay, so he was just being good and protective of me. :) 

Friday night came, and I was SURE that I was going to be proposed to that night. We had both dressed up nice, he came in his parent's convertible Camaro, and we drove pretty much right back up to Ogden where he had just driven from to come get me. 

We had dinner at Taggart's Grill, which was AMAZING. The views were spectacular--we were on the patio, there were peacocks walking around, there was a waterfall feature, and the mountains were so tall surrounding you. It was breathtaking. Plus, I was sitting by a pretty handsome guy. It couldn't get better than that! 

At the end of our dinner, Jacob was looking at the sky, and looked over at me and said, "Well, I was wanting to take you on a really pretty drive up the canyon that kind of overlooks everything, but it's a little too dark, so I guess we can't do that tonight."

When he said that, I thought he wasn't going to be able to propose. In my mind, I guess I was thinking that that was how he was going to pop the question, and it wasn't going to be happening that night. Thankfully, I had the entire rest of the ride back to Ogden to talk myself down and not be as excited that a proposal was going to be happening that night. 

We pulled up to Jacob's parent's house a little while later, and his sibling's cars were out front, but the house seemed dark. I mentioned that to Jacob, and he just kind of agreed with me, but was kind of quiet. We got out of the car, and as I was headed towards the house, he wrapped his arms around me and said, "Before we go inside, I have one more surprise for you, but you need to go around the side of the house, and I'll meet you there in just a minute."

I had talked myself out of a proposal for so long, that now my mind was kind of in denial that maybe this was his way of proposing. I still told myself it wasn't going to be happening that night, but when I walked around to the side of the house, his brother-in-law was waiting there with a flashlight at the edge of the lawn, surrounded by their huge trees with lights strung in their branches, and a pathway lit by little lights. At this point, the song, "Marry Me" came on, and I quickly realized that this was really happening. Ben, his brother-in-law, smiled and asked how I was doing. I laughed, kind of in shock that this was happening, and he laughed too, smiled, handed me a flashlight, and told me that Jacob had written me some notes, and to just follow the path and grab the notes in order off of the trees. 

I don't think I stopped smiling through this entire walk through the trees, and was so in disbelief that I was actually going to be engaged that night! My entire life, I've been waiting and living for this moment, and now that it was finally happening, my mind wasn't able to comprehend how incredible it was! 

As I read the five notes in the trees, and tucked them into my purse I had with me still, I turned around the last corner in his yard, and I was so overcome with emotion! I walked past their swimming pool with floating lights in it, and followed the path of tiki torches and lights that led up to the little patio/balcony by the house, where Jacob was standing, with a huge smile on his face, looking right at me. 

I walked up to him, put my purse down, and Jacob proceeded to tell me that I was the most beautiful and wonderful girl he had ever met and had the privilege of dating. He told me that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with me, and for those of you who watch (and LOVE) Downton Abbey, he told me he would be my Mr. Bates if I would be his Anna. (How great is Jacob?!)

At this point, Jacob got down on one knee, popped the ring box open, and said, "Brittany Rowe, will you marry me?" I said, "Yes! Of course! Yes!" And he stood up, we hugged, and he put the ring on my finger. Fast forward through my squealing from excitement, hugging, and a few kisses, and his brother-in-law and sister told us how happy they were, how excited they were, and then went inside so we could go sit at the outside candlelit table to eat our desserts we got from the restaurant from dinner. 

Jacob and I sat at the table and just were able to relish in everything, and enjoy our first few moments of being engaged. It's such a crazy feeling, and a really incredible, but unbelievable feeling! After about 10 minutes, we went inside and saw his family, where they just kept saying over and over how happy they were that this was happening, and that they were so excited that I would be a part of their family, and how great Jacob and I go together. 

Since then, we have told our families we are engaged, so now the general story can go out to the public. :) 

Also, Jacob and I just want to thank you for all the help and support and love you've given us as we start our journey towards married life! 

Mr. & Mrs. Stucki: Coming December 30, 2016

USU Graduation 2016!

I did it. I finally did it!

After dreaming about this day since I was 8 years old, attending two different universities in two different states with two different majors, I have finally done it. 

I graduated with my Bachelor's Degree in Communication Disorders and Deaf Education from Utah State University! 

I have already written previous blog posts about my acceptances to both BYU-Idaho and Utah State University, as well as my switch from Elementary Education to Communicative Disorders and Deaf Education, but never have I completed something in my life that was so extremely difficult, but so wonderfully rewarding. 

I am so thankful for my family, my friends, and for those who supported me through everything these past four years. I never realized how incredible a college education is, and how much more I feel like I can actually contribute to society, and make a difference with whatever job I have. I feel so much more confident in what I am doing, and am realizing that life is really just beginning. I'm at the threshold of a new start, and I am so excited to see what the next chapter in my life holds! 

Graduation was such a great day! My grandparents drove down from Canada to come see the ceremony, and to see me walk, and that meant so much to me. My parents and brother came to see me, and also brought me sunflowers, which have a lot of meaning for me. 

Two years ago, when I first started this major at USU, our professors came in to talk to our class, and told us that we were going to be weeded out--that this was not meant to be an easy major, and that if USU had a medical school, we would be in that. This was a pre-med degree, and one in the health sciences. My friend Hillary leaned over to me after they said they were going to be weeding us out, and said, "We aren't going to be weeded out. We're going to be sunflowers, towering over the rest of them. They can't get rid of us that easily." And since then, sunflowers have been my motivation to finish my college career, and have helped me get through the hard times when classes seemed impossible, and like I was crazy for going through such heavy credit loaded semesters. 

It was worth it, and I am so glad I stuck through the hard times, because with them, they also brought incredible times! 

Graduation was so much fun, and our Dean made the ceremony really great, and included us chanting and singing some of our last school songs together before we became USU Alumni. Walking across that stage was an incredible feeling, and I was so happy that my hard work had paid off after several years!

My family and I went to Maddox's for graduation dinner, and that was fun to go to, especially since I was also able to bring my boyfriend, Jacob, with us. It was a really great day, and although everyone was exhausted from moving and just being part of a long day, it was so much fun. 

Thank you Utah State, for everything you've taught me, for the friends I have made along the way, and for the bright future you have given me. I am so excited, and so ready, to take on the world and what it has to offer.

Live. Love. Laugh. Grow. 

Come Unto Christ

Last night I had the incredible opportunity to finish reading the Book of Mormon: Another Testament of Jesus Christ.

For those who don't know what the Book of Mormon is, I would invite you to read this amazing passage of scripture. The introduction in the Book of Mormon that talks about what the Book of Mormon is incredibly helpful, both for those interested in what the book is about, as well as for those about to read it again. It's a great reminder that this book is another witness of Jesus Christ, and that the teachings taught in this book are eternal and contain wonderful parables that we can relate to our life--no matter what spiritual level we are on. The Savior teaches through the Spirit and helps us relate parables and simple eternal truths to us, helping us on our individual journeys back to Him.

You can find the Book of Mormon and the Introduction here.

As part of the Introduction, an invitation is extended to everyone. "We invite all men everywhere to read the Book of Mormon, to ponder in their hearts the message it contains, and then to ask God, the Eternal Father, in the name of Christ if the book is true. Those who pursue this course and ask in faith will gain a testimony of its truth and divinity by the power of the Holy Ghost."

As I read the concluding verses of the last chapter in Moroni and finished the Book of Mormon, I couldn't help but smile and feel the Spirit's warmth in every inch of my body. I was so happy, and as I said a silent prayer, asking if this book really was true and contained God's word for me, I was so overcome by warmth and goodness from the Spirit that I cannot deny the truthfulness of this scripture.

I took a long time to read through the Book of Mormon this year, as I kept a scripture journal along with my reading. Although it took a while, and it seemed like I would never reach the end of the book, I learned so much--both about the truths in the book, and how God speaks to us through scriptures.

I am so grateful we have the resources and opportunities available to us in our day to come closer to Christ and develop a better relationship with Him. Throughout this time that I read the Book of Mormon, I realized that there was a general theme that I got through my reading and journaling. It wasn't about memorizing specific stories and names and places people were, but seeing the relationships people had with their Savior and Heavenly Father, and how it strengthened and changed their lives.

I am not very good at memorizing stories, names, or places that people visited in a timeline or chronological order. Some people are great at that, and so those stories are great reminders for them about the Savior and the lessons those people learned. So although I don't remember many stories from the Book of Mormon in great detail and remember all their names, I do know that the stories about each of their personal and spiritual development will stay with me and have taught me so much. I have related to some, I have aspired to some, and I have been comforted that those who were in a much worse state than I am were able to find our Father's love for them and grow and come closer to Christ.

In fact, if I had to say a theme that I felt as I read through the Book of Mormon this time, I would say that it is to "Come Unto Christ."

Every time I read, I get something a little different--something that I'm needing to hear and get from the verses. I love that the Spirit helps us understand and see what we need to pull from each verse and chapter in this book. The verses and chapters are always the same each time we read, but the message is clear and varies a little for every person, because of the Spirit helping us see what we need to work on to become what the Book of Mormon is challenging us to become: closer to Christ.

I'm so thankful for this book, and I am eternally grateful for those that sacrificed their lives and their safety in writing, translating, and producing this book that has helped so many find the eternal truths that our Heavenly Father wants all of His children to know and make a part of ourselves. I am especially grateful for Joseph Smith, and his courage against those who made bringing this book forward so difficult, and for his faith and reliance on the Lord, and for his enduring to the end that inspires me to be a better person, and to fear the Lord more than fearing the disappointment of man.

I hope whoever you are reading this, that you realize you have so many spiritual resources at your hands. We have the Bible, the Doctrine and Covenants, and the Book of Mormon. We have talks given at General Conference every 6 months that help us stay close to God as the world pushes more and more against us. We know that with every good and needful thing there must be an opposition. Although the world and our church (The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints) are taking very different paths and those part of our church are taking hits from those who may be confused as to what we believe and why we believe it, I know that relying on the faith we have in our Savior, continuing to read the scriptures we have been given, and building that relationship we have with our Heavenly Father will give us the courage and conviction we need to continue living and practicing the religion we are free to practice in this country.

I am so thankful for all that my Savior has done for me, and excited for His triumphant return one day, as He will reign again. I am so thankful for all that we have been given and blessed with in each of our lives, and that hard days do come to an end, that the Atonement can heal all wounds, no matter what we have done, and that we are able to live with our Heavenly Father again, surrounded and organized in our family units. As I have grown older, I have realized how beautiful of a thing a family can be, especially when a husband and wife are sealed together at the temple for both time and eternity. I am excited for the day when I am able to be married and sealed to my husband in one of God's holy temples, where we can build an eternal family together.

I encourage you, if you have questions, to ask kindly, to search the scriptures and other spiritual resources you have been given, and to ask for the Spirit to lead and guide you. You can't have someone else complete your spiritual journey, which is difficult, but such a rewarding experience. We each have the opportunity to grow and learn on our own. Yes, we can learn and grow from other's examples, but it is up to us to develop ourselves and grow spiritually. We are never left alone, and our Heavenly Father knows and loves each one of us. Every single one of us. He wants us to come to Him--He is our Father. He has prepared a way for us to return to Him, and although the path is not easy, we are each able to return to Him after having endured to the end and aligning our will with what He would have us be, where He needs us to be, and how He needs us to help others.

Live. Love. Laugh. Grow.

"It is Better to Look Up"

Holy smokes! I knew I hadn't written on here for a while, but my gosh...I had no idea it has almost been a year!

As much as that may show that I'm a slacker, I think it also has shown that this year has been really great. There have been amazing things that have happened, as well as some not so bueno things.

All in all though, this year has helped me grow closer to my Savior. I have found that when I don't have time to write on my blog, or call friends like I was able to, or just go hang out with anyone whenever I wanted to, I realized that the Savior and my Heavenly Father were always there for me. Not when they needed me most, or when I was at my lowest, but they were consistently there for me--supporting me through the hard times, cheering me through the great times, and helping guide me through the foggy times, where I didn't know where the next step was leading me.

I love the talk, "It is Better to Look Up" by Carl B. Cook, given in the October 2011 General Conference. I feel like it especially described my life this past year, and I have come to learn how to do this better, and although I am no expert in this principle, I know it has some amazing power to it. Looking up to God for help and support instead of sideways to the world brings some incredible power, insights, and strength that is otherwise impossible to find in the corrupt world we live in.



"Experience has taught me that if we, like President Monson, exercise our faith and look to God for help, we will not be overwhelmed with the burdens of life. We will not feel incapable of doing what we are called to do or need to do. We will be strengthened, and our lives will be filled with peace and joy. We will come to realize that most of what we worry about it not of eternal significance--and if it is, the Lord will help us. But we must have the faith to look up and the courage to follow His direction."

(Link to the AMAZING talk here!)

So, in summary, here's what happened this past year, just to catch all of you up:

January-April 2015: 
Finished my second semester at Utah State, and absolutely loving my major, the friends and roommates I had, and the fact that it was now summer time and I didn't have any homework anymore. I was on the Dean's List for both this semester as well as the semester before, which was also exciting. In this semester I got a job (for the following school year) as a Teaching Assistant for a graduate school preparation and professionalism class, as well as being accepted on USU's College of Education Student Council as my major's representative and the Marketing Vice President.



May-August 2015: 
Worked at Aspen Grove as a cook again, and loved the girls I worked with. I had so much fun every day, and even though living in a cabin in the middle of the woods was not ideal, it taught me that I am braver than I think (which is saying something--I'm still a chicken!), I am learning to love those I work and serve with, and that nature is God's incredible gift to us, but we sometimes have to really learn how to appreciate it. Capturing and throwing out 22 mice this summer in our cabin was definitely a highlight (insert sarcasm here), but I'm really glad I don't have to worry about that anymore. I had no internet, so that was a learning experience when I had to rely on phone calls and face-to-face interactions. Yes, I know, that sounds sad, but it's hard when you're a teaching assistant and can't grade papers online for your job until you go home to visit family and have to use the time to grade papers.









My brother, Darren, also left on his mission to Fukuoka, Japan, and we couldn't be happier. It was really hard on me when he first left, and I'm glad I was at work all the time to distract me, because when I wasn't working, or if I was with family, it took all I had to not break into tears. Darren and I had become really close, and it was hard to let him go for so long. However, I will say now (speaking from March 2016's perspective) that I am so happy and proud of him being out there. Yes, I miss him, but I don't cry over it or dwell on it anymore. I am excited that he is having the experiences he is having, and am looking forward to when he comes back next summer (July 2017).

Also, this summer was a lot of fun because my best friend, Robyn Kirkland (now Martin), got married in August! It was a whirlwind of emotions, mostly excited ones, but with marriage also comes the reality that you won't see or talk to each other as often as before. Which is great, that's the point of marriage. Anyways, I got to be her maid of honor, which I absolutely loved! We planned the bridal shower, I designed her bridal shower invitations, and I got to be there on her wedding day, in the pictures at the Bountiful Temple, as well as at her reception later in the afternoon. It was a beautiful day, and I am so grateful she found the man she will love for eternity and have a family with.



August-December 2015:
This was a crazy semester! I had so many things going on, and I have no idea (looking back) how it all worked out and fell into place. I was taking 18 credits, I was also registered in an additional 3 credits in Institute, I was serving in my church capacities, and I was starting to date someone. I took the GRE to qualify for graduate school, I was turning in graduate school applications, and turning in my undergraduate degree graduation applications as well. I made the Dean's List again for this semester of school too. It was a crazy whirlwind, and I don't know how I came out of it without going crazy or with more gray hairs on my head. And yes, I have a few gray hairs. Thank you, college life. :) Also, this was the first Christmas in 3 years that I wasn't stuck laying in bed for a few weeks because of hospital procedures. It was my ingrown toenails first, then my wisdom teeth the next Christmas, and then ingrown toenails again last Christmas. It was nice to be able to walk around and not be on pain medicine and sleeping through my entire break!



January-May 2016: 
Although I'm not taking as many credits as I was last semester (I'm currently taking 16), it's still a crazy semester. I am taking much harder classes, and some are much more frustrating because of the teacher's unrealistic or unnecessary expectations. It's been a rough semester as well. I broke up with the boy I had been dating, I found out I didn't make it into graduate school at either USU or BYU, and I had no idea where my life was going. It felt like all I had been working for was now thrown upside down, and had flown out the window, leaving me extremely confused and really anxious for what I was supposed to be doing. I realized that I probably have some sort of anxiety, more than what most people experience, but not enough that is debilitating, which I am thankful for. I have realized that this is a weakness that Heavenly Father has given me to help me overcome things and become stronger from--not to back away from and be scared of.

After a lot of praying, worrying, and finally remembering to "look up" (refer to previous talk link), I realized that God had never left my side, when I had left His, worrying and wandering, trying to find my way around and wondering what I was supposed to be doing. I needed to be patient, and go through a difficult time to realize what my answer was and where He needs me at a certain time.

Because I didn't make it into graduate school, I knew I needed to find an actual "big girl" job (as most people my age refer to "real" jobs as), which was extremely exciting, but really nerve-racking for me. I turned in about 15 job applications, to which I didn't get any responses from. However, after turning in one more, that to this day, I still don't really recall how I found their application and submitted it, I got a phone call asking for an interview to be a speech language technician (SLT) at the George Washington Academy in St. George, Utah. We held a Skype interview on Friday, and on Monday they asked for my references, contacted them, and offered me the job an hour later. I was initially supposed to go through a second interview with the principal, but after the Special Education Director and the Speech Pathologist talked to the principal about me and what my references said, the principal was so excited that she told them to just go ahead and extend the job offer without that second interview.



Things worked out, and even though I went through a very foggy and unknown path for a few months, where I was terrified and stressed out every day with what the future would hold, the more I turned to my Heavenly Father and "looked up", the more peace and comfort I was given, knowing that He never left my side. I just had to learn to trust in His timing, and realize that hard times will happen--we just need to recognize the Lord's hand in our lives to be okay with our current circumstances.

I was able to also audition and make it into USU's Symphony Orchestra, which has been so incredibly fun! I have been in one concert so far, with another coming up at the end of April. I was in the Gershwin and Rachmaninoff piano concertos as a 2nd violin, and will be in the Scheherazade piece as well as an opera piece written by Beethoven as a 2nd violin in April. It is so much fun, and makes me want to find a symphony orchestra in St. George to play in when I move there later this year.

Also, I will be graduating with my Bachelor's of Science degree in Communication Disorders & Deaf Education on May 7, 2016!! I am so excited to finally have a degree, be moving to St. George, and to be moving on in my life. I am ready for no more homework, for a real job, and to have such great opportunities in front of me. I feel like a new chapter of my life is about to begin, and I can't wait for what the future holds.

Live. Love. Laugh. Grow.